Sunday, February 17, 2013

Tank You Very Much.

Sometimes people are cusses.







Tank you very much...for your crap, we have a tank in response to which you can: a) start being a decent human being, b) be blown to smithereens. 

Advice: be nice to people that have sucky jobs, from personal experience we are already sad that we spend our lives doing lame stuff . I once looked at an application for Vons (grocery store) and it said, "why do you want to work at Vons?". For the money. Duh. No, actually it has been my life's ambition to collect shopping carts from a parking lot. What kind of dumb question is that? I am a good worker, but you best believe its for the money.
Also, be nice because people really will do stuff to your food. 
I have heard too many stories, it is very unlikely that they are all false. 

8 comments:

  1. I work part time as a Board Operator (or Light and Sound Technician. Either way.) for a theatre company here in Louisville. My job is basically to watch a show and make sure the lights change and music plays at the proper times. It's a fun job, actually. Anyway, this past week was the finale week of the show I was working and the lightboard unplugged and I was unable to start a blackout on time, which is how the actors know the show is starting. After a panicked few moments of brief and whispered conversations, the show began without the blackout. I then had some time to try to fix the problem and, when I fixed it, the stage blacked out right in the middle of the opening monologue. You can imagine my embarrassment. A tank blowing me to smithereens would have been appreciated at that point. Anyway, after the show, a really nice man told me I did a good job and it made my day.

    My point here is to reinforce your point: being nice to people while they work (even if it's not a crappy job, but just a crappy day) is a good thing to do.

    -Trish

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    Replies
    1. Well...the tank was supposed to blow up the mean people.
      Lights and sound board and stuff- sounds better than making eggs which is my school job, except when there are technical difficulties.

      Delete
    2. Haha. Oh, no, your comic was very clear on who was supposed to be blown up. I just meant... I would have liked for it to be me. Haha. I'm not mean, though. Probably.

      Do you get to eat the eggs that you make?

      -Trish

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    3. I get to eat some of the eggs. If I ate all of them I would probably perish.
      I can't wait until I try to apply to other decent jobs and get to have the following conversation:
      "so Liz, what kind of job experience have you had?"
      "I made eggs."
      "...that's it?"
      "pretty much"
      Actually I have had other jobs but thinking about them makes me sort of want to die so I am going to stop now.

      Delete
  2. I worked as a waitress while going to university. I will tell you first hand that *I* did stuff to people's food. I only did it a few times, and it was to people that came back and treated me like garbage again and again and again.

    Just a few things: spit in their food, scratched my peeling tan off into someone's coffee, dropped their food on the floor and just picked it back up, regarnished it and served it, dipped their meat dish in the grease pan.

    Don't mess with people that handle your food.

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    Replies
    1. I have clearly imagined blowing annoying people to bits with a tank..that's not the p.c.est.
      I should write a post about my old jobs- people were more crazy than mean there, including but not limited to: a woman who horded plantains and was fleeing the government because she was a con-artist.

      Delete
  3. Yeah, having a crap job and then being made to feel even more inadequate is a pretty lame thing. I know when I was a waitress (in Oakland of course) people did and said a LOT of rude things to me.
    However I never did anything to their food really. The worst I did was when those annoying preppy skiiiinny little girls would come in I would make their food as fattening as I could. I did that really often actually >.<

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    1. ooof- oakland does not have the most stellar of reputations. I went through it by train once and thought it looked desolate.
      How did you make stuff as fattening as you could? Now I am picturing you sneakily deep frying random objects and feeding them to people...which is awesome.

      Delete